Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
