I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize