I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
we're making bets on your personal life
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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