you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Let's get the cat blown out
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
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