im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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