sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
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We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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