Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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