OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
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