I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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