I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
