Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
