Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
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long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
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