so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
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