Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
