It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
jump out the window naked night went bad
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
