I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
