just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
