She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
