just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
