sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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