: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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