my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
