We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
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