I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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