This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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