How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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