I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize