Whod you bang
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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