it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize