Christians are straight up FREAKS
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
