This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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