All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize