I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
where am i from again
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
