I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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