That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
