I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
