We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize