I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize