Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
