you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize