The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Randomize
