So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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