Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize