umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome