R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
