i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Randomize
