what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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