The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
