She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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