is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?