Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
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Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
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I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!